{"product_id":"wholesale-pretend-its-christmasy-christmas-card","title":"Pretend It's Christmasy Christmas Card","description":"\u003ch2 style=\"color: #f82b2b;\"\u003eWholesale Pretend It's Christmasy Sarcastic Christmas Card: Vintage Holiday Greeting Stationery\u003c\/h2\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eThe \u003cstrong\u003eWholesale Pretend It's Christmasy Christmas Card\u003c\/strong\u003e is a 5x7 collectible retro humor greeting card featuring elaborate Victorian carnival typography, engineered for wholesale stationery racks and impulse registers in gift boutiques, bookstores, and novelty shops. Styled like an antique mercantile sign with festive holly borders and banners, this card delivers the ultimate deadpan seasonal greeting: \"Pretend This Card Says Something Christmasy, Or Don't, I Don't Really Give A F--k.\" Designed for retail shoppers exhausted by sugary holiday tropes, it offers an unapologetically hilarious, low-effort seasonal sentiment that commands attention and drives instant card-rack add-ons.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003cp\u003eProfessionally printed on heavy premium luster cardstock, each folded card delivers rich crimson and forest green tones, razor-sharp lettering, and a smooth semi-gloss finish that withstands frequent customer browsing. The standard 5x7-inch format includes an uncoated blank interior ready for custom handwritten notes and comes complete with a matching paper mailing envelope for retail-ready convenience. Sized to integrate seamlessly into commercial card spinner pockets, tabletop displays, and counter easels, this high-margin comedic staple drives effortless seasonal turnover for B2B stockists throughout the holiday rush.\u003c\/p\u003e\n\u003ch3 style=\"color: #f82b2b;\"\u003eFunny Holiday Cards \u0026amp; Sarcastic Christmas Stationery Specifications\u003c\/h3\u003e\n\u003cul\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDimensions:\u003c\/strong\u003e 5\" x 7\" (folded)\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eStock:\u003c\/strong\u003e Premium luster cardstock\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eInterior:\u003c\/strong\u003e Blank\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eIncludes:\u003c\/strong\u003e Matching mailing envelope\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eTheme:\u003c\/strong\u003e Sarcastic holiday humor, anti-holiday, adult comedy\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003cli\u003e\n\u003cstrong\u003eDisplay Compatibility:\u003c\/strong\u003e Standard 5x7 card spinner racks and counter displays\u003c\/li\u003e\n\u003c\/ul\u003e","brand":"Shady Front","offers":[{"title":"Card and Envelope Only","offer_id":67608989434165,"sku":"PRETENDITSCHRISTMASYCARD10126","price":2.25,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true},{"title":"Retail Ready Packaging","offer_id":67608989466933,"sku":"PRETENDITSCHRISTMASYCARD10126","price":2.75,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"thumbnail_url":"\/\/cdn.shopify.com\/s\/files\/1\/0371\/9417\/files\/Pretend-This-Card-Says-Something-Christmasy_Card_Mock.jpg?v=1790857200","url":"https:\/\/shadyfront.com\/products\/wholesale-pretend-its-christmasy-christmas-card","provider":"Shady Front","version":"1.0","type":"link"}